Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Xbox One to break heart, go down path I can't follow.

Xbox...go home.

I am saddened to say that, should the Xbox console line  continue down the announced path, I might have to break our 12 year strong bond.

I'm no stranger to buying the worst consoles of the generational race. Through no particular animosity I've managed to avoid all Sony Consoles but the PSP, which is like throwing a spear into the forest and somehow managing to impale your mother. So let me first discuss the things that are not that wrong about the Xbox 1.

I don't like that it's always on. I figure the genius who came up with that doesn't  know what a power bill is. "I know, needs to be on, so you can feel like Michael Knight ordering Kitt around. " I'm sorry, but the electric company doesn't accept "I'm living in the future" as down payment, Rosey The Robot. But, you know, I don't have a problem with having it disconnected most of the time.

I know some of you feel the industry's just about dying with all the piracy and used games, and that the only solution of for things like this, where publishers literally control the game, even after it's left for the consumer's hands. I feel this will not adress the problem. See, the consumer does not have infinite money. A person who was going to buy Killer Instinct 3 Gold Edition used and also a new Halo One is not going to magically have the money for both if you make him buy both wholesale. Most likely he'll let one in the store and get the other. I think if a  single game failing can bring down a whole company, maybe the company needs a better business model and to allocate it's resources better.Making a AAA game is super expensive.  But put so much money to ride in a single game? It's insanity on the part of the publishers. I think this kind of thing will only limit the amounts of games people buy.

I don't like that you have to have on Kinect all of the time. I see by now you've figured a good amount of people don't care about doing the humpty dance in their cramped room to the delight of no one, and the only way for you to ingratiate it with people is to basically make it a forced component of the game console. But I guess as long as it's part of the package and I can tuck it under my bed or something it's okay.

I don't like the small amounts of announced games. Sports don't count. Everybody knows  it's gonna have sports games. It's like announcing building will have rooms. But I guess E3 oughta solve all that.

I really don't like your "you can't play used games without paying" thing. It just strikes me as extreme greed. Are used games killing the industry? Because it seems fine to me. 

And yet I LIKE the idea of trading/selling your games to other people online. In a way, it would be like the days of yore, where you gave your cousin your shitty Justice League Task Force in exchange for a glitched-up Earth Worm Jim. Only, with infinite cousins,  holding literally every game under the sun. Theorically you'd be able to get any game you want, paying nothing, until you get stuck with Fusion Frenzy III, and nobody wants to trade.

So, with all that, I'd buy it. But there's a dealbreaker.

If it's true, that you literally can't play the console if there is no internet connection, I'm afraid we're never doing business. You see...I'm sure out there in Redmond you can get a fast, reliable internet connection  from tap water. All we get over here is chlorine and dirt. Simply put, I don't have the kind of money to pay the internet man every month. Internet choices over here are limited, and the are not reasonably priced.

I understand that games are essentially a luxury. I know I sold all of mine for one measly driving class hoping to have enough money from driving a wagon to maybe afford some newer ones, from after 2011.  But the way it plays out in my mind is, I buy your console, play with it for 3 months, and then, can't pay for no more internet. Then, oh, no, I can't play anything anymore.

And no hard feelings. I understand what you're doing here, with the all in one set up. Finally, we can watch TV from...our game consoles. It's a machine that does it all. Well, you know what, there's a machine that does it all, and it's called a PC. I can use it for games, watching internet videos, watch TV and write sardonic blog posts.  Game consoles are meant to play games, and anything that puts a "you can't play a game if" in there is bad for business. And there's like 3 of those in here. Sometimes a guys just likes to sit up and fire up a game. If Xbone's not gonna work that out for me, I might just move on.


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