Saturday, August 27, 2011

Movie news: Danger Girl,Wonder Woman, CG Yoda

Been a busy week, and I wanted to touch on some of the news that have been going around.

Latino Review, the site I go to for movie news now that Cinematical got offed, is reporting that a movie based on Chromium Era adventure comics Danger Girl is already looking to nab Sofia Vergara, Milla Jovovich, and Kate Beckinsale.

Even though it sounds unlikely, I do have to disagree. First off, Danger Girl is about breasts going on adventures.I mean, it's not like this is gonna be a deep study on the human condition or anything. If you ask for a ticket to Danger Girl, you are asking for a ticket to breasts.We're not dealing with  thought provoking documentaries about the Black War, here.




Not The Cove, here.
Why would anyone would associate breasts and Milla Jovovich? Secondly, both Milla Jovovich and Kate Beckinsale seem a bit...well, old to pull of this team. I mean, look at the images of the girls. Now look at Images of Kate and Milla. See? They should have brought some Michelle Rodriguez.



Sofia Vergara, however, does have the range to play boobs.



But really, they should have gotten Denise Richards to play all 3 girls. All the girls look just like she did when she was young, anyway.

The new 6 movie Star Wars box set is not going to be without itty bitty bitchy changes, apparently, as the Puppet Yoda from the Phantom Menace is set to be replaced with the CG version the other prequels had. Watch for yourself in this memorable scene and compare to the old one.

Now, maybe it's me, but I feel the puppet moved with more emotion and concern than the CG one, and it's not some "CG ruined everything" crap. It's the difference 'tween this

and
this.

Animation is an artform, and this was just badly animated. You'd think in one of the better, iconic scenes of the prequels they'd put more of an effort. It's not just putting it on the computer and setting the bump maps at max, damn you!

Director of movie I-have,-but-haven't-got-to-watching Valhalla Rising  Nicholas Winding Refn says if his upcoming remake of old, weird movie Logan's Run is a success, he's been promised to be let to make his Teta positive Wonder Woman movie. I am highly conflicted between how much I want it to be true and how little I think it is possible. Still, just a crappy remake and then we get our Wonder Woman. How's it going with those remakes, boys? Can we get the Starred panties now?

Hollywood is a funny place. They can find a concept and remove the charm out of it like no other. Eddie Murphy(Norbit, Pluto Nash, The Haunted Mansion, and the good movies they successful buried as well) is set to voice the titular character of Hong Kong Phooey in the new Live Action, CG hybrid. Invariably this will stupidly be about a dog who somehow acquires powers and has to prance around New York.



And invariably feature dated references.

What bothers me is, I know Hollywood has had it for putting CG animals/creatures in New York ever since Stuart Little. But why take something featuring anthropomorphic animals and ruin the charm by making them "real" animals. In a cartoon world, Top Cat is a cat that is also pretty much a person. We don't need that, but with the cat being an actual (crappy CG)cat.  We don't need actual CG gorilla Maguilla Gorilla, we don't need actual CG squirrel Inspector Squirrel.  If you HAVE to get your CG creature on New York bug on, at least pick franchises that lend  themselves to that.

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